If you’re convinced that your marriage is irretrievably broken and you’re headed for divorce, here are ten steps to take.
Consult an attorney: Become informed about your legal rights and responsibilities. For example, suppose you decide to take the children and live at your parents’ house until the divorce is final. From a legal point of view, moving to your parents’ home, even temporarily, could be a huge mistake. Copy documents: Go through household files and make copies of everything you can find: tax returns, bank statements, check registers, investment statements, retirement account statements, employee benefits handbooks, life insurance policies, mortgage documents, financial statements, credit card statements, wills, Social Security statements, automobile titles, etc. Make copies of any financial data stored on your home computer.
Inventory household and family possessions: List the major items: furniture, artwork, jewelry, appliances, automobiles, etc. Don’t forget to check the storage areas of your home and your safe deposit box for valuables.
Know the household budget and expenses: If possible, go through your check register for the past year and write down each utility, mortgage, and other household expense for each month. Keep track of the cash you spend on a daily basis so that you’ll be able to ascertain your monthly cash expenditures also.
Determine how to manage the family debt: If possible, determine the family debt and consider paying it down before divorce. While taking stock of debt, determine whether any of the debt was incurred by one spouse or the other prior to the date of marriage.
Find out exactly what your spouse earns: If your spouse earns a regular salary, it is easy to look at a pay stub; if your spouse is self-employed, owns a business, or receives any portion of income in cash, do your best to keep track of the money flowing in for several months. Make a realistic appraisal of your earning potential: Perhaps you have been out of the workforce for a while and have been devoting yourself to child rearing. Assess what your current employability is and whether furthering your education prior to divorce would benefit you in the long run.
Examine your own credit history: If you do not have credit cards in your own name, apply for them now, use them, and establish your own credit history. If you have a poor credit history, try to pay creditors now and improve your own credit rating prior to divorce. Build a “nest egg” of your own: You should always have access to money of your own. If your spouse moves out and stops paying bills, you will need to pay them until temporary support orders can be entered. If you are the one who is going to file for divorce, you’ll need money for a retainer. Start saving now and plan to initiate divorce proceedings when you have built up a nest egg of your own.
Put your kids at the top of your agenda: During the divorce process, keep your children’s routines as normal as possible. If you and your spouse cannot be together with the children without arguing, create a schedule of separate times for each of you to be with the children. Stay involved (or become involved) in your children’s school, sports, and social activities. Do not badmouth your spouse to your children. Put your children first in your life.
For more information and to schedule your consultation, please call The Law Offices of Steven B. Chroman, P.C., at 661-255-1800 or visit us at www.chromanlaw.com. Mr. Chroman is a Trusted Advisor Award Winner and named Top 100 California Attorney’s with over 28 years of experience and local service and a 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024 & 2025 Super Lawyer.
This article was originally published in Santa Clarita Magazine as part of our firm’s mission to make family law information more accessible to the Santa Clarita community. Read the full feature and others at santaclaritamagazine.com.