Divorce Sucks, But Yes, I’ve Heard That One Before…

A wooden gavel on a desk beside a sign that reads “Family Court.”

Not many lawyers, particularly family law attorneys, will tell you this, but I’m going to be one of the few lawyers to say it, I’ve just about heard it all. I’m not saying this to be cocky or arrogant, I am saying this because if you are reading this, it’s because you are in the attorney section, looking potentially for an attorney and deciding when and how you will make your move as the holidays, summer and vacations approach. That or you are reading it for a friend or loved one.

How do I know this? Because… I’ve heard it before, and for you, that’s a good thing because, support systems matter. I’m not implying you won’t receive individualized attention (in fact we pride ourselves on that) and I am not insinuating that your case doesn’t have its own unique nuances, but what I am saying is that I know the system, I know the players, I know the judges and I know the way things tend to fall and I am honest with my clients about all of the above. Just like I am saying it now.

Speak with your friends and commiserate. Go out or stay in. Cry or laugh. Do all the things you have read about in magazines, and then come in for your consultation where we can discuss your case, I can listen and give you guided professional advice as to your specific situation. You won’t scare me away, because I’ve heard it all before and then some. You will get to see if our practice is the right fit for your case.

In the meantime, here is an excerpt from our divorce coaching dialogue which we offer in addition to our legal services.

If you act inappropriately by being rude or disrespectful or not mindful of the judge’s orders or comments, you will dig yourself a hole that it is nearly impossible to escape from.

  1. Visit the courthouse/court room in advance of your hearing- see how people act, dress, when they arrive, and how the judge acts.

  2. Always say thank you to the judge at the end of your hearing, even if the outcome is less than desired. You are thanking the judge for his/her time and consideration, even if s/he didn’t agree with you.

  3. Do not interrupt the judge. Ever.

  4. If you are represented by counsel, you may not speak directly to your opponent’s attorney, and conversely, your opponent’s attorney may not speak to you without your attorney present.

  5. If you call or write to your spouse’s attorney when you are represented, it is not only a bad idea, but the attorney will not speak to you because you are represented and they are not permitted to.

  6. Judges are people, too. This means that not only do they have bad days and make bad decisions sometimes, but also they differ in their approach to certain issues. Never will you find two judges that will have the same outcome from a given set of facts.

For more information and to schedule your consultation, please call The Law Offices of Steven B. Chroman, P.C., at 661-255-1800 or visit us at www.chromanlaw.com. Mr. Chroman is a Trusted Advisor Award Winner and named Top 100 California Attorney’s with over 25 years of experience and local service and a 2021, 2022, 2023 & 2024 Super Lawyer.

This article was originally published in Santa Clarita Magazine as part of our firm’s mission to make family law information more accessible to the Santa Clarita community. Read the full feature and others at santaclaritamagazine.com.

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